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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26352121">Ficlet about an Office Plant</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/taylor_tut/pseuds/taylor_tut'>taylor_tut</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Magnus Archives (Podcast)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Ficlet, Fluff, Gen, Team as Family, set during season 1 where everyone is happy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 04:54:29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>786</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26352121</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/taylor_tut/pseuds/taylor_tut</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A prompt from my tumblr! "Jon is allergic to Martin’s new desk plant. He avoids his desk because he doesn’t want Martin to get rid of it and Martin is all :,( until he figures it out!!"</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>139</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Ficlet about an Office Plant</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/celosiaa/gifts">celosiaa</a>.</li>



    </ul></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>When Jon ducks into the bathroom to scrub at his eyes for the dozenth time that week, Tim, who is washing his hands at the adjacent sink, can't help but laugh. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Spending time at Martin's desk again, I see?" he taunts as Jon dries his face with a paper towel and blows his nose. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jon glares. "He wanted to show me an email."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What about?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"How should I know? My eyes were tearing so badly, I couldn't read it." </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tim tries just a little harder not to laugh at him this time. "Why don't you just tell him his desk plant is bothering your allergies?" </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'm not going to make him get rid of it," Jon argues. "What if it was a gift?" </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I mean, you're not asking him to set it on fire," Tim chuckles. "Just to take it out of the office." </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jon shakes his head. "This place is... difficult to handle, especially for someone like Martin. All the suffering in the statements, the scary research... Whatever you have to do to make the day a little brighter, you do. Sasha has her zen garden, you've got your desk photographs, but Martin has yet to bring anything. I won't ask him to take the plant home." </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Aw, Boss," Tim coos, "that's thoughtful. Borderline nonsensical, sure, but thoughtful." </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jon rolls his eyes. "It's hardly my business, anyway. I rarely have reason to be at the assistants' desks, so I'll just make it a point to host any correspondence in my office rather than coming to you." </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tim frowns at that plan, because he's heard some of the questions Jon has left his office to ask--often minor, easily Googleable, non-essential, or able to be found somewhere in a statement. It wasn't until Jon left his office to ask the assistants, "a quick, pressing question about the Hive: where do you think wasps retreat to in the winter?" that he realized Jon makes up questions for an excuse to, on days when he's not reading statements and in whatever weird mood that puts him in, leave his office and interact with his coworkers. It gives him a reason to stretch his legs and back, which get stiff if he sits still for too long. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But, Jon isn't an easy person to argue with, and it's rarely worth it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"If that's really what you want to do," Tim shrugs, drying his hands as Jon washes his own.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hm. Tim gives it two days before Martin catches on. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Two days later, Martin sits on the corner of Tim's desk, looking troubled. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What can I do for you, Marto?" Tim asks jovially. Martin sighs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You know Jon fairly well, right?" he asks, and Tim finds that insinuation horrifying. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"How well can anyone really KNOW someone like Jon?" he counters. "I tease him; he tolerates it. I know how to avoid pissing him off, and when to not avoid pissing him off. But if you're looking for a birthday gift or something--"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'm not--wait, is his birthday soon?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No idea," Tim says. "What's the question?" </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Did I... do something to make him angry?" </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tim blinks. "Uh, you mean more than his usual annoyance with everything any of us do?" </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yes."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Not that I'm aware of. Why do you ask?" </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Martin sighs again. "It's stupid," he prefaces, "but it's just--I feel as though he's been avoiding us?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"So you assumed it was something you did?" </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I wasn't sure," he admits. "It could be nothing. Just--usually he comes round a few times a day, just to chat. And he hasn't been."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tim's eyes go wide with realization, and he throws his head back when he laughs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I knew you'd figure it out! Two days--didn't I say two days, Sasha?" </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sasha nods. "You did." </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What are you talking about?" Martin demands, irritable at feeling out of the loop. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Jon's avoiding our desks because he's allergic to your new plant," he says. "He told me not to tell you." </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"That's absurd!" Martin sputters. "Why wouldn't he just ask me to take it home?" </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tim shrugs. "You know Jon: his thought processes are an enigma. But if you ask me--"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No one did," Sasha interjects. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"--If you ask me, he's afraid it might disappoint you, to have to take the plant home."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Of course not!" Martin replies, laughing a bit now, too, at the ridiculousness of it all. "God, that's really it?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"That's really it." </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>That night, Martin brings the plant home, and by Friday, there's a new one on his desk, a hypoallergenic succulent that Martin did not purchase and Jon insists had nothing to do with him, even when Tim catches him emptying spilled soil out of his bag. </span>
</p><p> </p>
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